The Balloon
There once was a boy just older than two
His favorite toy was a balloon
With other toys he wanted nothing more to do
How he loved the shiny light heart to the moon
How the balloon made him giggle
How the balloon made him swoon
Every time he saw it it made him wiggle
How precious, how loved was the dear balloon
One day, Dad had a bad day
The stress so insistent, built and built
Frustration always in the way
Oh how this day was the cause of great guilt
When Dad blew his top
The Balloon was his victim
The boy witnessed the grand pop
For on this day Dad held little wisdom
Broken was the balloon
Broken was the sweet boy
Broken was Dad that afternoon
As they laid to rest joy and the beloved toy
Later that night my husband attended the adult session of our stake conference. Since I was working that week I stayed home with my kids. When he returned that night he came to my bedside, as I had already gone to bed, with tears in his eyes. He told me how terrible he felt and how big of a jerk he had been. This was a big deal because I think I have only seen my husband with tears in his eyes a handful of times in 8 years. He asked me if we could keep the balloon and frame it. He wanted to hang it on the wall as a reminder of what he never wanted to do again. As I am often reminded of this event, by the framed balloon hanging on our wall, I can't help but think on the powerful lessons it taught that can be applied in life. I could have easily chastised my husband for being so hurtful and impatient. When I saw how truly upset he was, I no longer had the desire to put him on trial, he had already done that. It reminded me of how often I don't think about the person who committed the crime, or sin, or wrongdoing. How often do we just worry about the victim and not the other person? We live in a society where there is little acceptance of redemption for most crimes and wrongdoing. Often times I have thought what if I am that person, what if I am the one to hurt someone or do something terrible, intentional or unintentional? Ever since this happened I find myself wondering "how does the suspect feel", in many cases. My thoughts go to the one who made a mistake by accident and their actions were totally unintentional and without malice. My thoughts reflect on the ones who maybe meant to do what they did , but later feel deep sorrow. As my thoughts ponder, I realize, I am that person. We are all that person. Many times we make mistakes and accidents happen. I wish I could say that I had some amazing advice about being the perfect parent or avoiding all mistakes or accidents, but I don't! The fact is, we will all do something stupid, make a mistake, a misjudgement, or have an accident. Forgiveness can change people, even the simple forgiveness of a child. The remembrance of our mistakes is important! No matter how much we might want to forget, remembering is the best medicine to deter the same mistake, intentional or unintentional. I love the forgiveness of children because they truly forgive with their whole heart, but at the same time they don't let you forget about what you did. I think Myles reminded all of us for several weeks about what happened. When asked if he forgave Dad and if he loved Dad his answer was always "Yes"! His reminders were always tempered with love.
Myles did forgive and we did buy him a new balloon. The acquiring of a new balloon was also symbolic that things can be made new again, but there is always a price. It is not always easy to make things new again. Myles struggled with what was for him, a great loss. Dad had to struggle with his guilt and loss of control over the situation. Each lost something, each struggled, each learned a lesson and the power of forgiveness made them whole. Another price was paid, that was of course the cost of a new balloon. Not a high price, but a cost required to make it right. Making things new again requires action on the part of both parties. My husband had to buy a new balloon and Myles had to accept it. I thought it was ironic that the balloon said "love you" and it was heart shaped. Sometimes mistakes or accidents can destroy love and/or break hearts, hopefully this is only temporary. How often do we hurt the one who has infinite love for us? How often does He shed tears for us? How often does He forgive our mistakes? He gave His life for us and yet sometimes we fail to even begin comprehending what that means for us, and how all encompassing that measure truly is. Sometimes we forget to accept the gift that was given on our behalf. Christ covered the price for our "metaphorical" balloons, our sins and broken hearts. The cost of our broken "balloons" is only one part of the equation. Christ made it possible for us to repent, that is the gift we must accept. We must also forgive. This truly is the infinite cycle of life possibly the whole point to this life, repent and forgive.
With the weight of mistake
Great loss may come
The heart may suffer severe ache
It is all about who we, one day will become
For I am commanded to forgive
Forgiveness is how I can Change
For in this I cannot be passive
It might even feel strange
I am heavy with remorse
When my sins I cannot change
I can be forgiven, so I must stay the course
My life, I must re arrange
A price must be paid
Broken things can be made new
Is there one who will aid?
Yes, there is ONE who bears the sins we accrue
From death we can rise again
Because of the one who atoned
All is ours once more to regain
For we will never be disowned
No matter what we do
We will never stray too far
From the one who makes anew
The one who mediates at the judgement bar
For we ALL are His, we are worth mention
His sacrifice, to liberate was His mission
He gave His life, so we have redemption
And so, this life requires OUR Remission
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