"The Hand That Rocks The Cradle....."
BLESSINGS on the hand of women!
Angels guard its strength and grace.
In the palace, cottage, hovel,
Oh, no matter where the place;
Would that never storms assailed it,
Rainbows ever gently curled,
For the hand that rocks the cradle Is the hand that rules the world.
Infancy's the tender fountain, Power may with beauty flow,
Mothers first to guide the streamlets,
From them souls unresting grow—
Grow on for the good or evil,
Sunshine streamed or evil hurled,
For the hand that rocks the cradle Is the hand that rules the world.
Woman, how divine your mission,
Here upon our natal sod;
Keep—oh, keep the young heart open Always to the breath of God!
All true trophies of the ages Are from mother-love impearled,
For the hand that rocks the cradle Is the hand that rules the world.
Blessings on the hand of women!
Fathers, sons, and daughters cry,
And the sacred song is mingled With the worship in the sky—
Mingles where no tempest darkens,
Rainbows evermore are hurled;
For the hand that rocks the cradle Is the hand that rules the world.
For most of my life society and media have fed women lies about power, about femininity, about men, about responsibilities, about gender roles, about what is desirable, what is best for us, and where our true power lies! We now live in a world where being able to choose to kill your own unborn child is seen as an accomplishment, the peak or height of women's rights and power! Our world tells us that its always more important to be selfish! The choice to stay home and raise your kids is seen as stupidity, unambitious, and a waste of your time! Heaven forbid we have a moment of selflessness, how utterly archaic!
What is it that men and women do? Go out into the world and try to make it a better place through their talents and abilities. It always seems there is some arms race to change the world, do good, or to contribute to something great!? How many of the great inventors, writers, musicians, etc. who have changed the world would credit their mothers as being their greatest influence, teacher, or confidant? Most of the founding fathers of our United States were homeschooled, by who, you might ask........their mothers, fathers, neighbors, friends! I'm not looking to give women all the credit here, but how important is a Mother? I'll let you ponder on that.......
Has society let the simple ritual of valuing and thanking mothers to be a thing of the past? Have we hijacked the definition of a "good mother" and gave it new meaning? We have turned the nature of Mothering into something that should be looked down upon! Many women of today are so drunk on a superiority complex, fame, fortune, success in the world, and ruling the world that they have lost sight of the fact that woman already did/do rule the world!! I'm not saying women should never be in the work place or that they should not try to make meaningful contributions to changing the world in various ways, but they have forgotten about the power they wield that was in front of them all along........a child, the opportunity to make a mark on a child's heart! What do Mothers teach? They teach and show children that they are worth their time and sacrifice! They show children that their lives are valuable and mean something. To the world they are just one child, but to a Mother that child is her world. There is nothing more valuable than that! Mothers are truly the center and heart beat of society. "The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world". This is where women rule the world, in the home! Women have more power to change the world for good through raising their kids to be humans of good will! How much of your self worth and self confidence are tied to the way your Mother treated you? I'll let you ponder that, but I would guess quite a bit! Ever heard the phrase "If Mom isn't happy nobody is happy"? How many women out there in good marriages have husbands and children that would say their wife/mom makes the final call on most things? Or everything the husband does is for the good of their wife and kids? How many of those men would say their wife really rules at home? From my experience, most couples I meet that have a good marriage, the woman is served, cherished, and looked up to. I'm not saying there aren't any bad marriages or bad mothers out there, I'm sure there are. If you had a bad mother I'm sure you could still think of another woman in your life who was a good example of womanhood or motherhood, a Grandmother, an Aunt, a Sister, a Cousin, a Neighbor..........
Yes many influential women have done great things traveling the globe and being CEOs and have made valuable contributions to math, science, music, art, business, medicine, engineering, etc. No industry has gone untouched from the influence of women, which is great! To name a few great women that have reached my heart, Emilie du Chatalet, Rosalind Franklin, Marie Curie, Lucille Ball, Audrey Hepburn, Mother Theresa, Joan of Arc, Amy Carmichael, Gladys Aylward, Helen Keller, Harriet Turman, Shirley Temple, Beatrix Potter, Jane Austen, of course this list could go on for days! Women can do just about anything a man can and women have proven their equality in wisdom, intelligence, strength, hard work, and stamina over the centuries!
Perpetua's record is the earliest record of a Christian woman martyr. Killed in the Roman games on March 7, 203 AD in Carthage, Tunisia. Her record tells the world of her incredible strength, courage, and faith. She would not deny being a Christian and burn the incense to the Roman Gods, and for that she was imprisoned and sentenced to be tortured and die in the games. She was a nursing mother at the time and was only about 22 years old. She said she could not raise her son and tell him that she denied Christ to save her own life. She would not live a lie! Her belief in Christ was so important she gave her life for it, but more importantly she wanted her son to live knowing that her death stood as a testament to her belief. To her, this was the most important thing she could give to her son and to the world. Some might think that foolish, but her influence changed the world for good and converted many over time!
Being a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints I get asked questions about how women are treated in the church. In my church there is something men hold called priesthood power. This is the power of God and the power to act in His name. It requires worthiness. Since women do not hold this power, many inside and outside the church are very critical. There was a moment in my life when I bought into the lies of the world. In college I saw many friends get divorced because of abuse. I was not a fan of men at the time. I have always considered myself a bit of a feminist, but in college I did not want to get married. I remember seeing a movie called The Backup Plan with Jennifer Lopez. I thought that it would be fine to stay single and then get pregnant as a single woman by in vitro fertilization if I ever desired to have a child, like in the movie! I did not see anything wrong with that plan. I was independent and I did not ever need a man! So, how did my heart change? Well after attending many, MANY institute classes and studying the gospel of Jesus Christ in great depth I found the true nature of God! I'm no scholar by any means, but I discovered God's character, His great plan of happiness and the Divine nature I possessed. I realized the importance of being a woman and what that really meant. I found the measure of the stature of womanhood! In one of my classes the instructor asked us to list attributes of Christ and attributes of good women. Then we compared them, I remember being blown away by where he was going with this lesson! Then he said "what does the priesthood power do to men?" Then he started listing the attributes of women AND Christ and said "One of the reasons priesthood power was given to men was to help them be more Christlike because women already naturally possess many of these attributes." The more I have pondered that, taken counsel from righteous priesthood holders, and studied doctrine on priesthood myself, the more I have seen the truth in that lesson. Now women are not perfect, nor are they above men, they are equals, but isn't it true that women by nature are more meek, full of love, gentle, kind, soft spoken, forgiving, compassionate, understanding, etc.? This was the instructors personal thoughts on it, but I'll never forget it! It gave new perspective to the role of women and how important their influence is.
In thinking about this I was reminded of a powerful story of a pioneer woman. Her story illustrates how woman can access God's power just like men can. They too can call on the powers of heaven according to their faith. They do not necessarily have to hold the priesthood to access the powers of heaven, for God loves His daughters the same as His Sons and has given each important roles and responsibilities. The differences are important and divine. Here's the story!
A Miracle at Haun's Mill-- A Boy is Healed
"We sold our beautiful home in Kirtland and traveled all summer to reach Missouri... We arrived in Caldwell County, near Haun's Mill. Two days before this we were taken prisoners by an armed mob that demanded every bit of ammunition and every weapon we had. We surrendered all. They knew it, for they searched our wagons. A few more miles brought us to Haun's Mill, where an awful scene of murder was about to be enacted. My husband, Warren Smith, pitched our tent by the blacksmith's shop."Brother David Evans made a treaty with the mob that they would not molest us. He came just before the massacre and called the company together and we all knelt in prayer.I then sat in my tent. Looking up, I suddenly saw the mob coming -- the same mob that had taken our weapons. They came like so many demons... Before I could get to the blacksmith's shop to alarm the brethren, the bullets were whistling amongst us. I seized my two little girls and escaped across the millpond on a slab-walk. Another sister fled with me. Though we were women with tender children in flight for our lives, the demons poured volley after volley to kill us. A number of bullets entered my clothes, but I was not wounded."When the firing had ceased I went back to the scene of the massacre, for there were my husband and three sons, of whose fate I as yet knew nothing. As I returned, I found the sister in a pool of blood where she had fainted, having been shot through the hand. Further on was laying dead Brother McBride, an aged white-haired revolutionary soldier. His murderer had literally cut him to pieces with an old corn cutter..."Passing on, I came to a scene more terrible still to a mother and wife. Emerging from the blacksmith shop was my eldest son, bearing on his shoulders his little brother Alma."Oh! My Alma is dead!", I cried in anguish."No, Mother, I think Alma is not dead, but father and Sardius (the third son) are killed."What an answer was this to appall me. My husband and son murdered, and another little son seemingly mortally wounded, and perhaps before the dreadful night should pass the murderers would return and complete their work!But I could not weep then. The fountain of tears was dry, the heart overburdened with its calamity, and all the mother's sense absorbed in its anxiety for the precious little boy which God alone could save by his miraculous aid. We laid little Alma on a bed in our tent and I examined the wound. It was a ghastly sight. The entire hip joint of my wounded boy had been shot away. Flesh, hip bone, joint and all had been ploughed out from the muzzle of the gun, which the ruffian placed to the child's hip through the logs of the shop and deliberately fired. I knew not what to do. "Oh my Heavenly Father," I cried, "what shall I do? Thou seest my poor wounded little boy and knowest my inexperience. Oh, Heavenly Father, direct me in what to do!"Then I was directed as by a voice speaking to me. The ashes of our fire was still smoldering. We had been burning the bark of the shag-bark hickory. I was directed to take those ashes and make a lye and put a cloth saturated with it right into the wound. It hurt, but little Alma was too near death to heed it much. Again and again I saturated the cloth and put it into the hole from which the hip joint had been ploughed, and each time mashed flesh and splinters of bone came away with the cloth. The wound soon became as white as chicken's flesh.Having done as directed, I again prayed to the Lord and was again instructed as distinctly as though a physician had been standing by speaking to me. Nearby was a slippery-elm tree. From this I was told to make a slippery-elm poultice and fill the wound with it. My eldest son was sent to get the slippery-elm. From the roots of the [tree the] poultice was made and the wound, which took fully a quarter of a yard of linen to cover so large was it, was properly dressed. It was then I found vent to my feelings in tears, and resigned myself to the anguish of the hour.The next day I removed my wounded boy to a house some distance off and dressed his hip, with the Lord directing me as before. I was reminded that in my husband's trunk there was a bottle of balsam. This I poured into the wound, greatly soothing Alma's pain."Alma, my child," I said, "do you believe that the Lord made your hip?""Yes, Mother", he replied."Well, the Lord can make something there in the place of your hip. Don't you believe He can, Alma?""Do you think that the Lord can, Mother?" inquired the child in his simplicity."Yes, my son," I replied, "He has shown it all to me in a vision."Then I laid him comfortably on his face, and said, "Now you lay like that, and don't move, and the Lord will make you another hip."So Alma laid on his face for five weeks, until he was entirely recovered, a flexible gristle having grown in place of the missing joint and socket, which remains to this day a marvel to physicians.On the day that he walked again, I was out of the house fetching a bucket of water when I heard screams from the children. Running back, I entered and there was Alma dancing around and the other children screaming in astonishment and joy.It has now been forty years, and Alma has never been the least crippled during his life, and he has traveled quite a long period of time as a missionary of the gospel and a living miracle of the power of God.The news of the Mormon Miracle spread far and near and after Amanda went to Quincy, Illinois, she was visited by five physicians sent by a board of doctors in St. Louis who had heard of the case and wished to investigate. After watching the action of the hip as Alma walked, they declared it a complete mystery.They could not understand what kind of combination it was that supplied strength and action, for the hip bone was gone. A sort of gristle had partly supplied the place and it was just as strong as the other leg and as active though there was a depression easily detected through his clothing. They asked the name of the surgeon who had performed the wonderful piece of surgery. Amanda replied, "Jesus Christ". They said, "Not the Savior of the world." She replied, "Yes, the same, Sirs; He was the Physician and I was the nurse."(Compiled and written by David Kenison
I have often felt like I have one foot in the stay home mommy world and one foot in the working, independent feminist world. I feel like a fish swimming up stream in both sometimes. Truthfully, I've been judged by both of these worlds. Many times at work I am encouraged to apply for other jobs that would make more money or further my career, but my answer is always the same, "my kids need me and I just can't work more and leave them more, its not worth it to me". Some people have a hard time respecting that answer, but I find that many do. I work with many other women that are in the same boat as me. I see a lot of coworkers who have children and their husband graduates with a degree, gets a job, and then they quit their job to stay home. Some of these hopeful moms ask me when I'm going to quit. Sometimes I feel like I'm waiting to win some kind of lottery and I ask myself "when will it be my turn?" This just has not been my reality yet and I'm not sure it ever will be, I don't know what the future holds. All I know is I can hold on to hope and move forward doing the best I can! By some stay at home moms, I'm asked why do I work? If they don't know and they assume I'm choosing my career over my kids, I'm seen as some great sinner, or a horrible person! When I tell them my situation it's then all about "what's wrong with my husband, why can't he provide"? So there is judgement on both ends of the spectrum. We don't need any more unnecessary judgements on ourselves or others. We as women need to help each other and lift each other, reach out in love and compassion! No matter your lifestyle, choices, careers, religion, or opinions we can all agree women are important to this world in all of their capacities, we all have something of value to contribute! We need not bring each other down because of differences in lifestyles or opinions. Respect is needed on all sides!
Maybe next time you see a mom at the store or somewhere in public with an unruly child, instead of judge her parenting skill or ability to diffuse the situation, why not give her some encouragement or offer a lending hand in some way? Next time you see a mom going to work, taking care of kids and struggling to hold it all together, instead of pass her off as some selfish woman who does not want to take care of her kids, why not see if you could help her somehow? Put yourself in her position for a minute.
Little ones NEED their Moms and Dads......and they deserve them both, or one who is very dedicated, if that is the situation. No situation is ideal, but the parents are the most qualified to raise and help their children. I work full time to financially support my family while my husband stays home, that is our situation right now. I work a 7 days on 7 days off schedule so I can be a stay at home mom half of the time. It's hard, but worth it. My husband has sacrificed quite a bit to make sure we don't send our kids to someone else to raise. He wants nothing more than to provide for his family. He is always looking for jobs and ways to make money. He has even worked hard to create his own opportunities. My kids always want me and they get mad at my husband for not working more so I can stay home more. Everything I can give them is sometimes not enough, but we work hard to make it work the best we can! My kids love their Dad and I'm super grateful they get to be with him a lot because many kids don't get that opportunity, but much of the time they NEED Mom more! Moms and Dads are so important for kids, but in very different ways!
I'm also not saying that you have to get married and/or have kids to use your womanhood to make a meaningful difference in the world. All women have powerful influence wherever they might be despite marital status or children. We are all part of God's plan, we are ALL His children. We ALL have a role in His divine plan! We can all discover our own divine nature, the true nature of God and eat of the fruit of God's love no matter who, where or what we are! Let us all not forget the golden rule and how to teach it by example and in other ways. We all have this power to teach kindness, but as women, teaching our children is perhaps the most powerful thing we have to offer the world. The opportunity to help children know their value and that they are loved and important, this power is literally the power to heal the world!
"The World needs a sense of worth. And it will achieve it only by its people feeling that they are worthwhile."- Fred Rogers
This is what women do! Like I said, we all have the power to do this, but women do this by nature without even thinking, it's engrained in their nature, instinctual even. This is the power we must regain, reclaim and recognize its value! As a woman, mothering is not the only thing I do, but its the most important and valuable thing I can do! The world needs our grace!
I love all of you!
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